Glee you had an AMAZING Christmas episode, thank you.  Little did I know you threw everything you had at it because you were checking out for 8 weeks.  I know Seacrest has to have his American Idol spotlight or he gets cranky, but COME ON!  2 months?! Wanna know what’s even more sad about this?

Now instead of watching peppy, talented American teens deal with drama and triumph through witty dialog I have to watch mostly dumb, talentless real American teens deal with rejection during the first weeks of Idol.  I dare you to find anything this season on American Idol that is as groundbreaking or entertaining as this:

Mike Tyson made a thrilling appearance last night on Larry King Live.  This was a combined force to be reckoned with.  It seems like Mike is trying to turn his life around.  He’s got a baby on the way, he’s racing pigeons but not gambling on it (yes that’s a real thing).  Still I couldn’t get over the fact that Larry asked him stuff like “So Mike, does it hurt to get hit?”

Or how Mike sort of takes Larry’s compliment as a slam:

Maybe it was because it was 4am when I was watching and it was this or test patterns, or maybe it’s because I’m already having anxiety over Larry King leaving at the end of the year, but Larry if you’re reading this, this interview showed me I’m not ready for you to hang up the suspenders.

Justin Bieber + Nail Polish Line = Creep City.

Now I’m no marriage expert, but something tells me that if you’re the crazy knife pulling, cheating one, maybe it’s only decent to let your other half file for divorce.  Then again, it is asking a lot of Charlie Sheen to do the decent thing.

Confession: I’m not much for scary movies usually.  Frankly, life is scary enough.  This time of year I make a little exception when it comes to scary movies, as long as I can leave the lights on.  To this day, Carrie could be the freakiest for me…because it could happen. Seeing before I entered high school damaged me forever.

Thanks alot Sissy Spacek and pig’s blood.

The Exorcist (1973)

It’s controversial, it’s profane, it puts Satan in the body of a 12 year old girl.  The Linda Blair vomiting scene is one for the history books.

The Shining (1980)

Let Stanley Kubrick adapt a Stephen King novel, and you’re going to get freaky.

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Not being able to look at Anthony Hopkins without being completely terrified means this movie did its job.

Jaws (1975)

This is a classic case of the right music creating the right suspense.  You don’t have to see the great white shark right away to know what the deal is.
Halloween (1978)

Don’t judge a film by its sequels…in this flick you get the gold standard of boogieman, slasher craziness.
Psycho (1960)

Janet Leigh is the epitome of the beautiful blonde horror movie victim and Anthony Perkins’ creepy mama’s boy is dynamic and freaky from the moment you meet him.
Seven (1995) 

An apocalyptic thriller centered around the 7 deadly sins, this gruesome serial killer story pushes the creepy boundary.

Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

Talk about having a hell of a time as a new mom.

Poltergeist (1982)

This suburban California haunted house was a piece of the American dream literally built on a corrupt foundation, a graveyard packed with unsettled spirits.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

Turning a childhood bedroom into a murder zone is enough to make any kid not want to go to sleep.

Carrie (1976)

This is freaky because everyone remembers that boy or girl in high school that was a little bit of a “Carrie.”  Be careful who you vote for prom queen kids.

The Omen (1976)

Little Damien is every nanny’s worst nightmare.  Watch out for the kid with the 666 on this scalp.

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

The shaky camera movements and overall low production value on this movie makes it actually feel like these people could be real.  Creepy.

Justin Bieber is ready to tell all.  He’s got a 3D movie, nail polish line and comic book all in the works and now it’s time for the 100% official memoir, straight from the singers whiny lips.  Not quite ready to go out and spend $21.99 to learn about his humble beginnings, YouTube stardom, and romantic life or waste 240 pages of your life?

Here are the top 10 Things you can learn:

1.  Break some rules
“Singers aren’t supposed to have dairy before a show, but we all know I’m a rule breaker. Pizza is just so good!” -page 15

2.  No one starts a life like Celine Dion
The day I was born, March 1, 1994, Celine Dion was solid at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 with “The Power of Love.” Not a bad song to start your life on.” -page 26

3. Dare to be crappy at all sorts of stuff.
“Dare to be a sucky skateboarder or a lousy video editor or a completely crappy golfer. If we do only the stuff we’re good at, we never learn anything new.” -page 52

4. Dudes: Speak French, Impress Chicks
“Now I’m really glad that I speak French, because, let’s face it, girls dig it when a guy speaks French. They call it the language of love, and that ain’t no coincidence. Plus, I love my French fans! Très jolie!” -page 60

5.  Hockey or Beyonce…tough call in getting the blood flowing
“Nothing ever got my pulse racing (in a good way) like hockey. Well, nothing except Beyonce, but that wasn’t until I was twelve or so. Then, all of a sudden, it was like I opened my eyes one day and noticed that the world is full of beautiful girls, and I’ve had a hard time thinking about anything else ever since.” -page 71

6.  Got a small butt in 8th grade? It’s your destiny
“I got up there and sang my little eighth-grade butt off, thinking this was possibly the greatest moment of my entire life — of anyone’s life — better than hockey, better than ‘Star Wars,’ better than Grandma’s turkey and gravy.” -page 88

7.  Life without the hair swoosh is no life at all
“I’d just gotten the ugliest haircut of my life the day before. My trademark swoosh was hacked off into this squarish situation that kind of reminded me of Bart Simpson.” -page 124

8. Success is like bungee jumping in New Zealand
“I couldn’t believe things were finally coming together. I was almost afraid to believe it. The only thing I can compare it to is when I bungee-jumped off a bridge in New Zealand not long ago. It was a long journey to get there, but, at the last minute, there I was. Standing there. Ready. I had no idea what this was going to be like, but I knew it was going to be awesome.” -page 143

9.  Aim to be 1/10 Michael Jackson
“If I can do just one-tenth of the good Michael Jackson did for others, I can really make a difference in this world.” -page 177

10.  Don’t even THINK about swearing
My foot was broken. In the middle of a song. In front of twelve thousand people. And Taylor Swift. I won’t tell you the words that went through my head.” -page 199

After Mel’s girlfriend dissed Oprah, it’s now one of those questions she’s going to have to face.

OMG can you imagine how awesome Springsteen would be on Glee?  Here’s hoping there’s an awesome Courtney Cox/Dancing in the Dark moment.

Explain this to me: What crazy planets aligned that made it possible for Gaga and Bieber to reach 1 Billion views on YouTube?

If these two threw down cage match style who would win?

This is one of the most iconic Rolling Stone covers of all time, and was taken by famed photographer Annie Liebovitz on what would be the last day of his life.  The image was first published just a month after his death in 1980 and has been ranked the top magazine cover of the last 40 years.

Photographer Annie Leibovitz has said the original concept for the now legendary John Lennon and Yoko Ono Rolling Stone cover was for both to appear nude, designed to mark the release of their album “Double Fantasy.”  As legend has it, Lennon was game, shedding his clothes quickly, but Ono felt uncomfortable. Leibovitz recalled for Rolling Stone: “I was kinda disappointed, and I said, ‘Just leave everything on.’ We took one Polaroid, and the three of us knew it was profound right away.”

October 9th would have been John Lennon’s 70th Birthday.  Happy birthday to the man who gave us beautiful music and who has become a cultural symbol of peace and understanding…oh yeah, and he’s the walrus.