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Now We're Cookin With Fire
I'm not the kid of grillmaster who would step in an tell another grillmaster what to do on his/her grill. That is a clear violation of the grilling code of conduct. Still, if you're going to be cooking out this Labor Day weekend, we found these tips on how to make your burger [...]
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Friday Night 80s: Back To The Shoeture
This may be the greatest advancement in shoe technology ever.  It a merger between the 1980s and modern times as Nike has filed patent papers for a shoe with an automatic lacing system, similar to the Nike Air Mag from the "Back to the Future" sequel.The movie was set in 2015, so it [...]
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What Animals Learn From Us
You know if your dog or cat could talk, you'd be paying out a LOT of cash to keep them quiet.Here's the Top 5 list of Things Animals Learn From Watching us:5. Dog doo is such a valuable commodity it should be collected and put away.4. Humans lack the flexibility to properly groom themselves,but take [...]
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Music 411: Box Office To A Boxy Holding Cell
What's up with celebrities?  I think this is a case of feeling that you're above the law.Rapper T.I. and wife have been arrested on drug charges last night after police smelled alleged marijuana coming from their car.  Really dude?  Smoking and driving around...out in the open? The 29-year-old T.I., whose real name is Clifford Harris [...]
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Music 411: Can We Swear Now?
Cee-Lo Green's latest smash song is both a joke and art.He's the guy that made a big splash with the group "Gnarles Barkley."  They had a 2006 hit with the song ‘Crazy."Cee-Lo newsong has a profanity in the title, but the nice version is "Forget You." Green says it started like many his songs do: [...]
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Music 411: University Of Steve Miller
Oh yeah.  I've learned some great lessons from that school.This coming semester though, I may take "Swingtown 101" and audit "Jet Airliner" just for fun.  UW Grad Steve Miller is taking on a new role…professor.  He’s the Artist in Residence at the University of Southern Carolina’s Thornton School of Music.  The job will have him [...]
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You Are About To Freak Out
Seriously.  If they really go ahead with a plan that will require Movie Theaters to put the calorie count on the foods they sell, you will never eat there again.  That makes me sad, because the movie theater floor is where I pick up most of the traction that's on my shoes.The FDA says thousands [...]
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Ain't no party like a Party Patrol Party!
Hey guys! Hil-Dawg here!By far, my favorite experiences this summer have been when people from the community invite the Party Patrol to, well, patrol their parties! Two times this summer, I have been there when fans of Charlie FM have requested that the Party Patrol stop by their backyard parties to hang out, play games, [...]
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As If I Need Another Reason To Think Iowa Was Dumb
Cornfields, Hawkeyes, rednecks, corn and gambling in Dubuque.  I'm pretty sure that summarizes all that Iowa has to offer the country.Oh wait, their higher education can also be dumb too.  I guess this is funny to the cornfed.Iowa State University students have been campaigning on Facebook for Professor Tin-Shi Tam to play Lady Gaga's [...]
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Jerks For Co-Workers?
I hear ya.  I used to work with a guy that would sleep naked on the radio station couch overnight.  Man that made for some weird mornings.In any case, the producer of American Idol (Nigel Lythgoe) is now pointing a strict finger at Simon Cowell, saying he is the reason why Ellen DeGeneres bailed out.  [...]
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Posted by Charlie on September 2, 2010

What’s up with celebrities?  I think this is a case of feeling that you’re above the law.

Rapper T.I. and wife have been arrested on drug charges last night after police smelled alleged marijuana coming from their car.  Really dude?  Smoking and driving around…out in the open? The 29-year-old T.I., whose real name is Clifford Harris Jr., and his wife were booked at the West Hollywood sheriff’s station and bail was set at $10,000.

T.I., is a key performer in the current movie “Takers,” which took the #1 spot at the box office this past weekend.

T.-Clifford-I needs to remember this. There are specific celebrity roles out there.  Snoop Dogg is the weed smoker.  Lindsay Lohan is the insane one.  Mel Gibson is the angry one.  Perez Hilton is the D-bag.  Katy Perry is the lame one.  You can’t co-opt one of their pre-existing roles.  It upsets the natural celebrity universe balance.

Posted by Charlie on August 30, 2010

I hear ya.  I used to work with a guy that would sleep naked on the radio station couch overnight.  Man that made for some weird mornings.

In any case, the producer of American Idol (Nigel Lythgoe) is now pointing a strict finger at Simon Cowell, saying he is the reason why Ellen DeGeneres bailed out.  He says there is a place for Ellen, but that her and Simon just didn’t get along.

Lythgoe let Ellen out of her contract one year ahead of time, which is pretty cool.  But that begs the question.  Would you ever quit your job just because of a co-worker that’s a major jerk?  Do you rat them out if they’re being rude or just handle it yourself?

Posted by Charlie on August 17, 2010

The Madison Mallards brought in an act for their season finale last night, which exceeds all awesome expectations.

Mini Kiss, a band made up of little people who dress and perform cover songs of KISS. (By the way…have you entered to win KISS tickets yet?)  They sent the Mallards off in style, but it got me thinking about weird cover bands.  Here’s my list of some of the oddest:

Beatallica: Beatles covers in the style of Metallica. Essentially mashing up classics from Abbey Road with more sinister lyrics. “Leper Madonna” and “Fuel on a Hill.”

AC/DShe: a San Francisco-area AC/DC cover band that has — you guessed it — all female members. My face is melting already.

Chicks with Dixie - An all transvestite Dixie Chicks cover band. Yee Haw!

Gabba - An ABBA/The Ramones cover band- Imagine if The Ramones sang ABBA songs. Have a listen.

The Red Hot Chili Pipers - Oh man! Bagpipe versions of rock songs? My ears already hurt.

The Misfats: A bunch of fat guys trying to be punkers The Misfits. That’s a buddah belly and some…

Mini-Kiss: Maybe the best/worst cover band of the all. here’s an appearance from Jimmy Kimmell. You wonder if they know the other lyrics?

Posted by Charlie on July 29, 2010

For once in our lifetime, a story about drunken cows isn’t from our backyard.

Kinda sounds like it should be though.  As seen in the movie Tommy Boy, we love tipping cows.  We have a beer named Spotted Cow. We give our brats a beer hot tub.

But the story about a Canadian farmer who is (WTF!) feeding  his cows red wine is curious.  It’s kind of a pre-marinating.  He gives his cows red wine for the last 90 days of their life before they head to the butcher.  He says the cows are happier and seem to want more wine.

Ummm…I think that means they’re drunk and now can start enrolling in Al-cow-holics Anonymous.

Posted by Charlie on July 9, 2010

With Art Fair On the Square this weekend, I was feeling an itch to do something artistic.  The fair goes Saturday from 9a-6p and Sunday from 10a-5p.

Sadly, outside of sayin’ snarky junk on the radio, I don’t have much of an artistic flair.  I do have a knack for Googling things and I found some pretty cool artwork:

Posted by Charlie on June 24, 2010

Mariah Carey is in the doghouse.

She can still hit those high notes, but she can’t seem to write a check out to a New York Vet whom she owes about $30,000.

The vet is suing for what they call “extraordinary services” last fall for Carey’s three Jack Russell terriers, named Cha-Cha, Dolomite and JJ (not sure which one is pictured with her.) The doggie doctor says the Grammy Award-winning singer paid only about $8,000 of the nearly $38,000 in charges.

What the heck can be so extraordinary for a dog that costs $38,000?

- Diamond encrusted leash for dogs & husband Nick Cannon?
- Doggie bags made of leather?
- Pooper scoopers of gold?
- Dog tongue enhancement surgery?
- Gold plated dog teeth?

Posted by Charlie on June 17, 2010

This begs the question, why get married after 8 years of dating?

Harrison Ford and Calista Flockart finally decided to tie the knot this week.  Good for them.  I mean after 8 years, just about everybody considers you a married couple anyway.

Love works in mysterious ways so who am I to crack the whip?

Bonus: Top quotes overheard at Harrison Ford’s wedding:

5.  “Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?”
4.  “You can’t do this to me! I’m an American!”
3.  “Take this. Wave it at anything that slithers.”
2.  “You Americans, you’re all the same. Always overdressing for the wrong occasions.”
1.  “I don’t know. I’m making this up as I go.”

Lets just hope the wedding dinner wasn’t the same as the meal they ate in Indiana Jones and the Temple Of Doom.

Posted by Charlie on May 17, 2010

Was it just me or was anyone else confused by Tom Petty on Saturday Night Live?

He’s a southern fried American rock icon, but his performance sounded like he had marbles in his mouth. I liked the beat. I liked the guitars, I just need a translator to figure out what he was saying.

Posted by Charlie on April 29, 2010

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery…right?

That, or Hollywood just loves taking an old idea, repackaging it for the next generation and making some money off it.

Tomorrow, the new A Nightmare On Elm Street opens in theaters, and although Johnny Depp wasn’t included in this one, it may have some legs (or sharp fingers as the case may be.)

The big secret they’ve been hiding in what Freddy Krueger is going to look like.

This is Rogert Englund from the 1984 version (right).  Pretty freaky.

The new Freddy is Jackie Earle Haley.  He’s a pretty talented actor who has appeared in The Watchmen, Shutter Island and oddly enough, one episode of MacGyver. Why is he appearing in a teenager slasher flick?  Probably the money.  That’s OK though, because moves like that often give actors/actresses the freedom to star in the movies they want to.

Here’s the only images we’ve been given of the new Freddy:

Looks kind of like a burn victim, but that’s what Freddy is supposed to look like.

I’ll let you judge for yourself if it will be worthy of your entertainment dollar.

Here’s the old and the new movie posters for some fun too.

Posted by Charlie on April 28, 2010

Not to criticize Skymall magazine, but who actually buys that crap?

Here’s some of the craziest stuff of theirs that we found:

Really!?! Who needs this?

Honestly, you didn't catch this!

Almost too crazy to comment on…

I guess…if the music helps get things moving.

Grandma will never get lost again.

For when you need to work, talk on the phone, use the computer and organize stuff…WHILE YOU DRIVE?!?!?!

Kinda looks like drinking and driving to me.

I'm calling to let you know that I'm drowning.

For the drunk who needs to free up both hands.

Thanks to Huffington Post.com for sharing.

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