Apparently 50 is the new 99 years old these days.

Michael Jackson goes at the big 5-0, so does Billy Mays. It’s just nor safe to be a celeb anymore.  So, what have we learned from all this?

Prescription drugs can take you out early. Just ask Elvis, Anna Nicole Smith, Heath Ledger and now MJ.  Also, keep that cholesterol down.  Newsguy Tim Russert and Billy Mays found out the hard way.

At least there’s still plenty of OxyClean left for the world.

Yeah…that’s just about enough, don’t ya think?

I think I’ve seen and read more news coverage about Micheal Jackson over the weekend, than my brain can hold. Sure we like the music, but this is gonna get worse before it gets better.

A worldwide remembrance, independent autopsies, the funeral, fan reaction, celebrity reaction, your fifth cousin’s uncle’s sister’s neighbor’s dog’s reaction. Oh yes, as long as there is another angle to cover, we’re gonna see it all.

Sorry Billy Mays and Farrah Fawcett, you’re sadly both taking the backseat on this family minivan trip into the world of “how far can this story go” land.

By the way…here come the conspiracy theories in 3…2…1…

Conspiracy theory #1 – He’s not dead

Looks like I’ve lost the opportunity, but there is one question I would like to ask the King of Pop, if here were still here today.

I could go hard core and just ask him straight up if “he ever did it.” I don’t think I’d get a straight answer because he’s dodged that question before.

My question would be; “Was it all worth it?”

You can amass fame, fortune, and enough money to fund a small country, but will all that make you happy? I’m guessing the answer is no. Michael Jackson seemed like a tormented person. His eccentricities were splattered all over front pages around the world and that type of scrutiny and spotlight can make anybody crazy.

I’m not defending how he handled himself. His reactions to the world around him were often bizarre. But if you think about it…how would you have reacted. And…if it were you in his place, what would you have done?

I think anyone in a similar, isolated situation might respond likewise.

You’ve probably seen by now the stink that celebrity blogger Perez Hilton is making after allegedly getting beat up by the Black Eyed Peas at a club.

It’s an interesting idea that celebrities are fighting back against paparazzi, but I wouldn’t say this is the beginning of a new uprising.

In fact, you could even argue the case that Hilton might have had it coming to him.

Lets see, would you write “fatty…ugly and stupid” on somebody’s picture, post it on the internet for millions to see and then expect they wouldn’t get upset?

Sorry Perez…you get no sympathy from us.

Thank goodness we had 2 Baldwins to save us from more memorable Speidi moments.

Rated PG-13 – 2h30 -
Reviewed 6.24.09 -

Somebody call the police, because Michael Bay is missing a plot, people I care about and anything resembling good movie making in his latest Transformers explosion-fest.

Here’s where I would try to explain what the movie was about, but this one was all over the place with at least ten subplots, which I’m not sure are connected to each other in any way. If I were to guess, this movie was simply a tool to market the toys, video games and other gizmos that will be readily available for purchase at a store near you.

It’s a fun idea to think that robots can (or soon will) be able to take on human qualities like feelings, emotions and passion, but will a robot ever be able to smell? I don’t think so, and that’s just one of the dumb things that the robots I once loved as a kid are doing this time.

Another dumb feature is the absence of who I consider to be the main character. Not Shia LaBeouf, but Optimus Prime (leader of the Autobots…the good robots) is missing for a good chunk of the film. He’s the only intriguing “person” that you might actually feel for.

Watch out for a double dose of Jar-Jar Binks. The cop-out stereotype from the Star Wars prequels shows up in the form of twin, street-talking Transformers. Are these characters supposed to be a pair of friendly, gold tooth-wearing gang bangers?

On the flipside, I think I slightly liked the sequel better than the first Transformers movie. Why? I guess I’ve grown complacent and have accepted the low quality films that Michael Bay keeps churning out.

What you will see is an orgasm of explosions, robot fights, bad dialogue and praise for the US Armed Forces. (I thought I was watching an Army recruiting commercial at one point.) Not all of that is bad, if you don’t mind completely exchanging style for substance.

The blockbuster of the summer opens in theaters today. If are to believe what the early reviews are saying about Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen, we’re better off setting fire to the money that we might spend to go see it. It will be less painless.

Charlie’s Cousin Adam went to see the midnight IMAX show at Star Cinema. Find out what he had to say about it later today.

Poor Ed McMahon died this morning in an LA hospital.  He had a whole bunch of health and financial problems lately that came to a head with the Superbowl Commercial he did with MC Hammer about him being broke.

None may be more greater than his attempt to rap, which happened as he was trying to pay the bills while pimping for Free Credit Report.com

The amazing true story of my absence, and why I’m like Britney Spears.

As far as we can tell, Megan Fox doesn’t really have any acting talent, but she sure is a looker.  She’s in the new Transformers movie that comes out on Wednesday, but as far as we know, she hasn’t had any other big roles.

She’s on almost every single guy’s magazine website, all the time.  She’s also got those classic Hollywood looks like Scarlett Johannsen, but seems to be more interested in looking like a stoner chick than anything.

In any case, over the weekend she apoligized for dissing this kid who was trying to give her a yellow rose.  She said she didn’t see him.

Yeah right…