Some sauced up yahoo from Ohio got busted for a DWI while driving this 38 MPH modified lawn mower.

Now to be fair, he probably thought that he was still sitting at the bar.  The flashing police lights could be explained by dance floor lights, but he should have noticed something was wrong when he asked for directions to the bathroom and ended up in a drag race with some teenager driving a tricked out Honda Civic.

Rated PG – 1h34

Reviewed 3.29.09

It doesn’t rank with the best of the animated flicks, but it does show how computer generated movie making is a modern day art form.

In Monsters vs. Aliens, a giant robot has invaded earth. The government calls upon a group of B-movie monsters (a blob, a screeching giant insect, a 50-foot tall woman) its been holding in secret for years to fight the space invaders.

With the exception of the giant insect, who enjoyably plays a brainless mammoth, none of the characters stood out, or entertained me. While there was a lot of scurrying from one scene to the next, (showing off the 3D animation) the story was uninspired.

Here are two things I noticed. Many of the kids were shuffling around for the first few minutes, the film managed to grab their attention and hold it for the entire runtime. The other was the noticeable absence of laughter.

I always say, no matter how cool a movie looks, its nothing without a solid story to support it.

Rated PG-13 – 1h32

Reviewed 3.29.09

It’s a capable horror movie; just don’t try to sell this as based on a true story.

The Haunting in Connecticut is loosely based a scaring that happened in the 1980’s at an old funeral home. In this version, a struggling family moves into the home because it is near the hospital where the eldest son is undergoing cancer treatment. They discover there is a good reason why they got such a good price on the place.

The sins of the past provide for some creepy scenery and scares, but there are a few too many “scary house” clichés to make this an intriguing story.

For those looking for a good scary ghost story, this ranks somewhere between 1982’s remarkable Poltergeist and 1986’s stinker Poltergeist II.

Without finding out what really happened, I would have been satisfied accepting the “based on a true story” tagline. A quick Internet search will tell you that the film was just a fraction of what happened in real life. That’s a downer, because I was expecting to accounts of the real deal, not a reimagining.

Not Lance!  Say it isn’t so!

A word to the wise for any Disney star.

Like hell, without the chance of a tan.

Is that love story even worth $10 Million?

Note to other housewives: watch your pockets.

U2 just said in an interview, they once invited a record executive into the recording studio while laying down the tracks for Sunday Bloody Sunday.  The exec asked them to get rid of the word Bloody.

Good thing they didn’t pay attention, but wouldn’t it be an odd world if bands took that type of bad advice?

We’d have something like:

“Wasted away again in sodaville.” – Jimmy Buffett

“You slept nicely all night long” – AC/DC

“We all were polite in a yellow submarine.”-  The Beatles

“When I think about you, I touch my knitting supplies.” – Divinyls

Now really, is that fair?  She was the perfect balance of crazy and beautiful.  In fact, on Charlie’s Craze-O-Meter Beauty scale, she was registering a perfect 10.

Did Charlie Sheen monkey with the vote or what?
Denise Richards got the axe from Dancing With The Stars last night.